Love Christ. Love Others.

The Bible doesn't specifically give us a "section" to follow within the world of love & dating, but it does give us many principles & commands that should influence our world of love & dating. The Bible still gives us the foundation & is very clear on how it is to be done properly. So students, and adults, take note.

First, you have to have the solid foundation of love found ONLY in the sacrificial love of Jesus Christ. 1 John 4:9-11 tells us just how much God loves us by sending His one & only son Jesus to die on the cross for our sins. The perfect, unconditional love of Jesus. And in receiving that love, we are then called to love others just the same. To love everyone the same way Jesus loves us: unconditional & self-sacrificial. To love others by putting them ahead of us. To put their wants & needs before ours unselfishly. Jesus did it for us & we are called to love others just the same. 

Once we are loving everyone the way Jesus tells & shows us to, then friendship must be the next step. To have the brotherly & friendship love among others. This should only be a natural succession if we are truly loving like Christ, & a solid foundation must be set before progressing. ONLY after this foundation found in the love of Christ & friendship has been established can dating even be an option. 

AFTER the solid foundation, your first thought when approaching dating should be this: he/she is my brother/sister in Christ. Wow. Would that change things? You have to first recognize every boy & girl as your brother & sister in Christ. Especially when dating. Now, within that scope, let's take a look at a couple of other guidelines:

1. You need to date just that - a brother or sister in Christ. As a Christian, you need to date a Christian. Because if we are loving, within our foundation, unselfishly like Christ, then we know that a lost person needs Jesus. No matter how bad we want to be in a relationship with that person, no matter how perfect they are - they don't need you. They need Jesus. Again, let me repeat that. They don't need you. They need Jesus. So if we are loving like Christ, we will give others Jesus before we ever give them a dating relationship. 
2. Your relationship should be a thing of growth. Your significant other should be one that is challenging you spiritually & challenging you to grow more in Christ. If your relationship has made you feel distant or less involved with Christ, then it is not a relationship you need to be in. The most important thing you need to look for in a significant other is Jesus. One that challenges & helps you to grow as a disciples of Jesus Christ.
3. Naturally, if you are growing towards Christ with your significant other, then your relationship should be one that is pure, appropriate & pleasing to God. Sin is always crouching at your door, so if you are giving into a temptation here & there, Satan has you. We have to be extremely careful to protect ourselves by remaining pure in our obedience to Jesus. Basically, don't do anything you wouldn't do in front of your parents. Or how about don't do anything you wouldn't do at church? Do whatever you can to avoid temptation & appearances of evil. Remember, this person is your brother or sister in Christ.

Dating, just like every aspect of our life, should focus on obeying Christ. He should be the main focus of everything we do in this life & dating is no exception. Love Christ. Love others. 

JV